


Catch You When You Fall

by AceOnIce



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Has Anxiety, Canon Compliant, Drabble, M/M, No Plot/Plotless, Supportive Magnus Bane, it's just alec having a panic attack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:14:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22566103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceOnIce/pseuds/AceOnIce
Summary: Alec has a panic attack after a mission gone wrong. Magnus is there to help him through it.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 20
Kudos: 168
Collections: Favorite Malec Stories





	Catch You When You Fall

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah... Not my best work, but I wanted to write Alec having anxiety~

Getting a call from Isabelle, knowing she and Alec and Jace were on a mission scares Magnus more than he cares to admit. He answers it on the first ring, throwing his notebook aside. 

"Hello?"

"Magnus, you need to come get Alec."

"Is he okay?" Magnus is already summoning a portal, except he doesn't know where he's going. His stomach twists. "Where are you?"

"At the Institute. He's safe, but he's locked himself in his office. The mission didn't go well and I'm worried about him. He won't talk to anyone."

"I'll be right there."

Magnus steps through the portal directly into Alec's study. He finds his husband curled over his desk, breathing hard. His hand is wrapped around a pen, but he's not writing anything. Magnus swallows. "Alec? What's wrong darling?"

Alec moves so quickly Magnus barely sees him, jolting up from his office chair and throwing himself at Magnus, wrapping around him. Magnus catches him instantly, lacing his arms around the shaking Shadowhunter. Alec's voice is only a whisper, reverent and disbelieving. "Magnus."

"Darling, what is it? Talk to me." 

When Alec doesn't say anything, Magnus moves his hand to the back of Alec's neck, scratching through the hair at the nape of his neck. Alec makes a small noise and Magnus realizes he's crying. "We're going home."

Alec shakes his head, curling his fingers tighter into Magnus' jacket. "I've got paperwork, I have to finish-"

"I'm sure it can wait."

"No, no, I-"

"Then Isabelle can do it or I can bring you back later. We're going home."

Alec makes another noise, but he doesn't protest this time. Magnus flicks his wrist to unlock Alec's office and then creates a portal. He untangles himself from Alec enough to pull him through it.

They step into their bedroom and Magnus leads Alec to the bed, sitting down and pulling his husband into his chest. "What can I do?"

Alec sniffs, ducks until his nose is level with Magnus' collarbone, huffing warm breaths against it, breaths that are still coming too fast. Despite his stature, he looks so small curled up like that. Magnus longs to help him. He runs a hand through Alec's hair, traces his face, the other firmly wrapped around Alec's waist. 

Finally Alec speaks, "Can you- can we... I want-"

"Take a breath. Try again."

He does. "Can you get rid of our clothes? I want to hold you."

"Of course." Magnus waves their clothes away, leaving only their boxers in place. He reclines them both until they're laying comfortably, Alec tucked into his chest.

"I love you Mags."

Something about the way he says it, the way his voice breaks, shatters Magnus' heart. He squeezes his eyes shut, drags in a breath. "I love you too Alexander. Would you like to talk about it?"

Alec shakes his hand, his blunt nails digging into Magnus' sides as he holds him impossibly closer. "Not now, please."

"Okay, just breathe. Breathe with me."

He feels and hears Alec mimic his breaths until his body starts to relax, until he's lured into a restless sleep. Magnus stays awake, calming him every time he wakes, breathing too hard or crying or shaking apart at the seams.

When Alec calms down and regains his peace of mind in the morning, the first thing he does is apologize. 

"You have nothing to say sorry for Alexander."

"I should've handled it. You shouldn't have needed to come get me." Alec is pacing the bedroom. He'd gotten up to use the restroom and returned in this state, chaotic and self-deprecating, but no longer hyperventilating. 

Magnus stands up, stops Alec by standing in his way and grabbing his hands. "Hey, I will always be there for you. _I will catch you when you fall_."

The reminder of their wedding vows makes Alec go limp, leaning into Magnus. Alec leans to press his forehead against Magnus'. His hazel eyes are closed. "Thank you."

Magnus squeezes his husband's hand. "Any time. I mean it. Any time you feel like that, call me. Please. Let me be there for you."

"Okay. Okay, I will."


End file.
